69

You can post all funny things here during the winter period. This section will be cleared automatically after 20 days.
Benutzeravatar

Topic author
Big Ade
Beiträge: 280
Registriert: Sonntag 25. März 2012, 16:42
Vorname: Ade
Wohnort: Sheffield, South Yorkshire, England
Alter: 73

69

Beitrag von Big Ade »

That's my age now, and I just remembered a joke about it (the number I mean).

An old farmer who had lived a very sheltered life way up in the Yorkshire Dales won the lottery and had to go down to London to receive his monster cheque at an award ceremony. £96,569,261 was a lot of money but being a properly careful Yorkshireman he took £150 in cash to go and see the all the must see tourist sites. He went to all the free museums and art galleries, watched the changing of the guards, looked at the Tower of London and Houses of Parliament and as he had walked between them all he had managed to spend not one penny of his cash.

Feeling pleased with himself he decided to get a meal and ended up in Soho. Lots of places to eat but he wasn't paying their prices. As he wandered the streets he noticed lots of cards for things like 'kitten for sale', 'whip lady', 'naughty girl' and more. He asked a cabby what it meant and was told that they were ladies of pleasure (prost*tutes).

Having had a very strict upbringing he knew of only one way to do 'it' and this was an opportunity to discover more and nobody back home would ever find out. So answering to a card he ventured up a dark stairway to be met by an attractive young lady.

She said normal is £100, French is £125 and 69 is £150. He knew normal, didn't want anything French so asked what 69 was. She explained that they would both be naked and he would lie on his back, she would lie on top of him with her legs either side of his head so that his tongue could explore her and she would use her mouth on his erect member. She promised him that he would very much like it and he agreed. They stripped and assumed their positions. Almost as soon as they began she coughed which caused her to faart. It was a ripper with an almighty strong smell that made his eyes water. He pushed her off and blew his nose, cleared his throat and wiped his eyes. She apologised profusely and encouraged him to resume the position. As soon as they started she sneezed which made her faart again and again it was an absolute ripper with a stench that would peel wallpaper. The old farmer threw her off him again and standing up said "that's enough, here's your £150, I couldn't take another 67 of them".
Antworten